SG Exams

 When Sandra Bullock declares that she does not understand Sg Maths, you know that your country’s education system and stresses has reached world level pinnacle, in terms of having curriculum that is known to be more challenging.

By now, I have already gone through 3 rounds of PSLE, 2 rounds of O levels and 1 round of A levels with many more to come. 

The first round of PSLE was traumatic and brought with it hard lessons. That the expectations we had for our kids did not matter much, definitely not more than wanting them to be alive and being next to us, to grow and be the beautiful people we wanted them to be. 

I know the reason why we want our kids to do well is cos we want their journey to be easier and not be so hard if they did not do well in their education. Sure there are stories of people who didn’t do well in their studies, doing very well in life. But these are few and far between and the reality is that they make use of the talents gifted them or had other blessings in life that helped.  How many of us really have such talents or special supports?  We may not have what it takes or the know how to build a successful business etc, may not have the gifts to sing well or perform.  For most of us, it is the education that we have that becomes our insurance for that better life.  

As I went through more rounds of national exams, I realised that the grades did not really matter. Sure we would be happy if they did well, rejoice and celebrate. But what mattered more was that they are happy. What’s the point of imposing our wants on them? It’s no longer our lives to live. We already had the opportunity to live ours and now its their journey.

Its hard to see them disappointed and upset with the results they get. You know they have tried and the only way now is forward in making the best of what they got. I realised when they didn’t do as well as expected, that I did not feel upset. Rather it was immense worry as to how they would cope with the results and manoeuvre their way through the system that lowers options as the results varies.  I can rant about the system but what really can I do, no matter how much we rant, the system remains largely the same.  

It may be hard but we need to trust that God has the best of plans for us, though it may not be what we thought we really wanted. 

Who knows what my life would be like if I had gone to Mass Comm as I had really wanted years ago. Would my life be the same? I seriously doubt. But my life’s journey took me to where I am now, and its the best one for me. 

First times first jobs

 When Sarah completed her O levels, she took on a job as a bookshop assistant. This time, it was Tasnym’s turn to take on her first job ever and this girl clearly knows what she wanted or not. Factory or packing jobs were not for her though her friends were taking these up.

And the job must pay more than $10 an hour so that she could afford a gym membership as she puts it.  So we arranged for her to take on a job at her uncle’s gym to kill 2 birds with one stone. She was happy with it but soon realised that it didn’t offer her a daily engagement so off she went searching for another job, this time in the medical industry.

Got to admit I was surprised that she was willing to take on a job at a hospice changing diapers of the elderly. “Why would I care if I am seeing naked old people?” 

So we got her to practice on her brother’s diaper first! Unfortunately, the job did not pan out and she was told they had too many manpower (hmmm…) And she refused to change her brother’s diapers anymore after that. “cos I am not paid to do it!” She says.

Oh well… she was then offered a job as a health assistant at TTSH and that’s where she has been almost daily 7 am to 7 pm.  Honestly, I do kind of wonder why more singaporeans are not taking up the job.  The pay is good and so are the benefits with food provided for all the workers.  The job didn’t seem too hard with the only downside being the 12 hour shifts.  But its not like a person had to be on their feet throughout that 12 hours. There were lots of opportunities to take breaks in between. And of course you need to have your full PPE on.

One thing for sure, Tasnym is determined that she wants to pursue a career in the medical field.  This mama is making lots of prayers that she achieves her dreams. 

First days

 It’s the beginning of the new year.  Our ritual has been a first day photo but this year is definitely much different from the rest! Well for one thing, 2 girls are no longer in school.  And with covid, start of school is staggered to different days for different levels. 

This year, Hanz would start his journey in Hanis. I should indeed be careful with what I wished for.  Off he went straight into the classroom without a backward glance! And not gonna lie, there was a pang in me that wished that he did look back to look for me to show that I am still needed. But nope, this boy has decided he was big enough for school and not in need of his mum anymore. Even the other mums were commenting how he was totally tearless and fearless. Well that half hour when I got to sit in his class helped (I meant me, not him!) as he would run every 5 min to give me a hug before running back to join his class. It was like he was assuring me, its ok Mama, I still need you!

It was short lived anyway. Third day comes along with the tears and wailing. This boy delayed reaction or wat? With the tudung tugging and hand pulling, insisting that I be in class with him. He had fever after coming back from school, which could possible contributed to him being cranky. 4th day of school was the same with the school having to call us to fetch him as he started coughing. Come home and all the symptoms were gone with him being super happy to be back home. Ok 2 days medical leave for this boy anyway since he kept coughing through the night.

Not exactly the best of beginnings of a new year, with 3 kids and one mama down with a bad throat.