Maybe Baby?

People around are always quick to ask whether we would go for the 4th child after knowing that we have 3 girls.  What, is there a sure-fire guarantee that just because we have 3 girls, we would end up with a boy?  Anyway, did anyone say that we actually wanted a boy?

My feelings are ambivalent really.  I really love babies and part of me do want one... nothing to do with wanting a boy... I even have pros and cons about either gender. I was telling the hubby the other day that I wanted a baby cos Daniah is no longer a baby and he was asking whether I would then want yet another one once the new baby is no longer a baby? Hmmm... Funny thing was that I was at a family event the other day and was watching a group of boys boisterously wrestle around and generally running amok.  I went hoem that day and told him, ok I change my mind... but it can be a girl... and then I get the girls shouting and screaming and quarreling with one another... ok, not really helping in convincing anyone about having another child around the house.

We put the question to the girls and Sarah's immediate reaction was "Are we going to adopt? When? I want!"  Where did she even learn about the notion of adoption? My friends think that some little ears have been eavesdropping on my work conversations!
Tasnym's reaction was "I want, I want, when can we get?"
Hey you think what ah? Buy from a shop is it?

Daniah's was the easiest.  A simple "No"
I mean, come on, why would the one who is getting so much attention now want something that would be a competitor right?

So, I really don't know... Some parts of me is scared of having to go through that whole pregnancy bit again, the morning sickness etc and I am not exactly a spring chicken.  And the biggest question of all is can we actually cope.  Someone told me that the size of the car is the best family size determinant.  I mean if you have a 5 seater, you can only have 2-3 children (with car seats) or they can't all fit into the car.  If you have a 7 seater, then you can have 4 children with the maid but no boot space... hmmm...I wonder how my Malaysian cousins with their 7 kids (and more) pack in all the kids during their long drives around?

To have to go through all that night feedings is yet another deterrent... but but... babies they are just so cute!

Kid Peeves

OK we all love our kids, or should I say most of us do... some of us are indifferent to our kids and I know a small minority who actually hate their kids.  Same way that we love our husbands, there are just some things they do that simply riles us up.

With my kids, some of the things they do simply drive me up the wall.  Take Daniah, who talks at top decibels all the way, its amazing I have not lost my eardrums or two... or should I say maybe I already have.  I seem to be suffering from hearing difficulties these days. Not surprising considering how loud shouts and screams can be in confined places like the car. I seriously do not look forward to the drive home from my mum's home daily, as not only do I get one loud screaming voice, I get 3! It's like a conspiracy to see who can drive Mama up the car wall or a conspiracy against each other to make sure NOBODY gets air time! It's mad, everyone will be quiet until one soul decides to open her mouth, the other 2 will quickly interrupt with some story of their own.

Dun let that face fool you! It carries loud decibels!

With Sarah, her thumb sucking is something that once used to be so cute, but now at 9 years old, just looks simply off! We have tried everything, the nail stop etc but nothing worked as she continued to such her thumb. I seriously wonder when she would stop.  I couldnt believe it when one of my former helpers shared that her daughter was still sucking her thumb at the age of 15 years! Ooookay... 

Interestingly, Sarah shared that her close friends is aware of her thumb sucking habit and that they too have shared about how they too are still sucking their thumbs or drinking milk from a milk bottle. Hmm, nice to know Sarah...

As for Tasnym, its her tendency to cry at the drop of a hat. I mean life is a huge crisis to this girl.  She reacts first, only to quickly turn off the tap when she realises that what she initially thought was not true.   But amazing is her ability to turn the tear tap on and off. She is really true to her name of being a fountain... though I am not too sure about it being in heaven..

Got kissed by the chicken?

Tasnym is down with chicken pox.  I was quite suspicious when I first saw the marks on her body but quickly dismissed my initial thoughts as she was immunised against it and she did not have any marks on her tummy/chest. No fever too.

We spent the day in USS and there we met my cousin who quickly said that it appeared to be chicken pox. A quick check down her t-shirt showed one red spot on her chest. So off to the doctor we went after contaminating USS, and he confirmed the diagnosis.  He said that it was mild as she was immunised but caught it as she did not get a booster.  Thing is I do not recall him telling me of the need for any boosters.  So possibility of Daniah and Sarah getting it is there too since they too were immunised but no boosters.  I too have no way of separating them. Anyway, its too late!

This is the same girl who would refuse to take any kind of medication. And she refused to have the cream applied beyond that one time cos it was itching too much.  Miracle cream though it was as the marks dried up so fast and stopped itching.  I can still remember my time suffering from chicken pox with calamine lotion all over but offering scant relief.  My mum then found this leaf, which I have no memory of what its called, that was pounded and made into a paste to be applied to all the marks.  I am still left with one massive crater on the tip of my nose from the pox. And the agony of having to stay home for two whole weeks! This girl will probably just stay home for a week at most.

The girls have been asking why it is called chicken pox. I have no clue! The papa told her its cos she got kissed by a chicken in the night, ha ha!

So how did chicken pox get its name? And isnt it interesting that despite years and years of being around, no cure has been found.  The medication you get alleviates the symptoms but does not rid the person of the virus, same as HFMD.  I think the scientists are spending too much time on cancer and the big diseases that not many wants to spend time on these other 'lighter diseases'. Its supposed to be contagious a day or two before you see the spots and remains contagious until the scabs form.

To think of it though, many of western medicine serve to just alleviate symptoms and not deal with the virus itself...

Memories

Was rifling through old photos and really found some gem that I have completely forgotten abt! Only thing is these days rifling through old photos means looking at soft copies on the computer and not in the album.

I was the dedicated mum before making sure I printed every photo and mark them out etc but by the time the third one came along, I am not sure I even completed her first album. The 2 older ones even have a first year video montage, uhm with Tasnym's just ha;f done actually. But today I completed Daniah's... well it helps to have a good software, was kind of scratching my head trying to figure out how to use iMovie but got it done anyhow.  Just waiting for it to get published.

Found this very old photo of the girls first meeting with Daniah and how they were fighting with each other to carry Daniah! The doctor set was a new toy that had been given to Tasnym by my friend, who is also her godma, Bee. Gosh, to see how much the girls have grown since then and Daniah is turning 5 in 3 weeks!

 It's the school holidays and not quite knowing what to do with the girls.  At least they are old enough to entertain themselves with Sarah at the piano and Tasnym the addict, playing some game or other on my iPad. Her iPod and her laptop have both been confiscated cos of her tendency to just play non-stop!  Was thinking of bringing the girls to the park but the rain spoils a lot of plans. Perhaps we can go to the new Sentosa Marine Park tomorrow... maybe...

It's been a long time

Seriously been long... 2 years plus... since I wrote anything here.  Just felt the pull to go in and read my blog and I felt that I should really continue this as it really helped me recall all those times as the girls were growing up. Videos and photos can only tell so much but not the feelings and thoughts that were going on within. Was kind of laughing at some of the things I was writing, things that I had completely forgotten abt Sarah, Tasnym and Daniah.

All these last few months, we had been lamenting on how we were struggling in managing Daniah, only for me to read on how we struggled with Tasnym those years. OK, now Daniah dont seem so bad! Ha ha!  We know she was a very chatty baby, and remains a very chatty 4 years old.

Daniah's main problem is her need to shout at the top of her voice.  There are some babies of the family who are quiet as they get drowned out by their elder siblings.  This baby of mine, makes herself louder to assert herself and ensure that she never gets drowned out!!  Drives home from work is not fun considering how I have to battle traffic and 3 loud voices from the back seat.  Loud singing and boisterous laughter is one thing.  Loud shouts and quarrels is another.  Oooh my eardrums!!

 4 years ago

1 year ago... let me root around for a recent one

Sarah is going to P4. She got a certificate for being in the top 25% of her school for her level, though I would not say the results is fantastic, I know she can do better in Maths.  But for the other subjects, she really has done really well.  Tasnym too has done well in her P1 exams.  She is the best behaved in school which makes us wonder what is it that the teacher has done, where we as parents have seriously failed??!!

No Way!

Wow, its been some time since I wrote. And the girls are really growing up fast. I feel like the days are just whizzing past me and can't even seem to catch hold of where the days have gone. Sometimes I wish that I could just make time stop for a moment to truly enjoy what is going on. Work really does not help with so much to do, time seems to just whizz past even faster.

I took some books on making jewellery from the library a few days back and gaze in envy at the beautiful creations. The interest is there and I know I can make them but I really do not have the time. It is only recently that I manage to restart my love to read... even then its after telling the girls to give me a few minutes either before or after I read to them at bedtime.

Daniah is really growing up so fast... favourite phase now? Oh Man! and No way! all from Dora Baby Gaga, her favourite show... funny thing is she still looks very much like a baby to us... to think that Sarah and Tasnym were big sisters at her age. She still looks too small and too much of a baby to ever be more than the small sister.

But don't undermine her, small she may be but she has a fiery personality... like the saying kecil kecil cili padi! This chilli padi is not afraid to assert her rights and pull her small weight around. Also a true parrot, who absorbs everything Tasnym does and then copy! Both are partners in crime but when they fight... oh man!

Phone Parenting?

I guess as any working parent, I am guilty of phone parenting... when you call your kids from work to check on them, make sure they are doing what you want them to do and even scold! How effective is this really? I mean how much would the child actually do what we asked knowing that we are some distance away and not in the vicinity to catch them not doing what we want...

With Sarah in Primary 1, I am calling to ask her to do some pieces of work, check whether she is ready for school etc etc... and already she has lost 4 different items in school, from her wallet to her colour pencils to her water bottle.... the list goes on! She is so careless!

As it is, I am also having one or the other calling me to complain abt each other! And they even quarrel on the phone, each one shouting at the other over 2 telephones! sigh... Funny thing is that even Daniah is doing this complaining abt some fictional things that Sarah had done to her! Whenever she wants something, she will just say "Sarah take mine!" That one is becoming a complete Tasnym clone!

Primary One!

And its official! My first baby is in Primary 1. What a trooper as she walks up the bus and into the school without worry... except for the mummy shedding a tear by the side!

And off she goes in the bus with us following in the car behind... yeah fine we have joined the realms of kiasu parents.... but better than being accused of being neglectful right?

Off the bus and into the school... I am not the only parent taking photos and videos ok!

And to the canteen with her Primary 2 buddy... I was surprised to see how the canteen was condoned off to parents and the parents having to see their kids from afar... better than completely being barred entry into the school I guess... I can fully understand why too, what with the parents and grandparents hogging tables, the kids won't even have a place to sit!! Sarah could not even be bothered with her parents, preferring to sit and eat, only coming over when we kept asking her too... the Primary 2 buddy was all vigilant, running after Sarah and getting her to go back to their tables quickly!

Gone are the days when our mums used to peep from the classroom windows and were on hand at every recess! My mum was all anxious asking me why I was not staying in school with Sarah... not that Sarah even needed it!

Funny thing was that Tasnym was the one who missed Sarah the most, calling me multiple times to ask when Sarah was coming home! And what a joyous moment it was when both younger sisters went down to pick Sarah from the school bus! ha ha! Hopefully, this would make Tasnym stop fighting with Sarah so much! As they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder....

A new year.... 2010

Ok... I have been lazy and have not been blogging but I am just superbly whacked out... And actually... also a bit lazy lah!

Oh my gosh, all this for me??

The look of joy having a full bowl of ice cream placed in front of her- simply priceless!

New year and new beginnings... and Daniah just turned 2... on 27 Dec... we went to the zoo in the morning and to Swensens... the look of delight on her face as the firehouse ice cream was placed in front of her, it was like "Am I dreaming? A whole ice cream for me?"... that was simply priceless!

I don't have new year resolutions... don't see any meaning to it.. why must I wait for a new year to have a resolution?

But I am freaking out over Sarah going into Primary 1 though she is pretty calm and nonchalant about it... Would she know where to go after the bus drops her off? Would the teachers be there to receive her? Would she make friends? Would anyone not be nice? Sigh... and how is she gonna cope with the bag? It is so heavy!

Tasnym has been prepared that she is going to Hanis on her own but I doubt it has truly sunk in... esp when she realises come 4 Jan that Aryan is not gonna be there too as he has been transferred to a child care centre.

And Daniah? I think I will wait for her to be a bit older before I send her to Hanis too...

Dead exhausted

She was so dead exhausted from all the shopping that she fell asleep slumped over the side sofa! The amazing amount of things to buy, this is truly a shopping paradise.... and at such super cheap prices too! I can see where Mini Toons got some of their stuff....

The stuff here are so cheap! And seems like, people are really into bling with shops at MBK sticking on gems unto phone and NDS covers making it bling bling! Some are a bit the ohbiang la but some pretty nice ones. Check out some that we bought! Cool huh?

Sawadeeka!

This is what my home should look like.... either that or I should make sure I always travel in style... no more cheap hotels... yeah like real...

Daniah checking out her new home...

anywayz, the family is in BKK this weekend and staying at the Ascott. This is luxury living!

The girls got so excited to have their own room complete with a bathroom and tv!

It comes complete with a utilities area for washing clothes and kitchenette. The toiletries are all locitanne! And the best thing yet is all this is free... courtesy of hubby's company.... jealous right?

Tutup, tutup

Daniah is so quickly picking up words but it is so funny listening to her, how she mispronounces them and stringing her words into a sentence without the injunctions in between...

Ahnie, Ahbop and Ahto.... members of the last tailong gang? Nope, they are just Barnie, Baby Bop and Tomato, Daniah version! Or Cuca encing... to say that my cousin was urinating... how she knows that, I dunno, just her assumption cos the lady was in the toilet! ha ha!

She has also started labelling any skin exposure as shame shame and a quick order to "tutup, tutup, tutup!" or cover up... hopefully she does not do this in public, well not yet at least...

It does amaze me how quickly pick up the words around them and I think I can safely say that my kids do have an impressive vocab for their age.... for example, Tasnym admonishing Sarah last week "Can you keep quiet! I cannot concentrate!" when trying to do some Maths sums...

Who is that teenager?

Sarah suddenly decide one day that she was going to have her own room and sleep on her own. So we proceeded to convert the study into her room and have her sleep temporarily in the unused baby cot. And she proceeded to chase both her sisters out and start closing the doors to change clothes... but the last straw was when she kept the door closed and remained inside for an inordinate amount of time. "Since when did we have a teenager in the house?" I asked hubby. And the rule now is, you keep the door open! My baby is growing up! And she had no problems what so ever sleeping on her own.... it was only her mummy who was ever so worried and Tasnym as usual, wanting to make sure that she always has excess to the same room.

Talking about growing up, she graduated from K2 last weekend... the musical she acted in was hilarious but ok, at least we can rule out acting for her career! And definitely there were tears in my eyes as I saw her graduate and dance her graduation dance. Seems like I am more sad than she is that she is leaving her friends behind. Soon they will be just a passing memory to her.
Receiving her graduation scroll...

Seems ironic to me that as she was leaving friends behind, I reconnected with mine in a reunion of sorts at the graduation ceremony. Met 3 Secondary school classmates, all with graduating children. We have moved so far in our lives, while for our kids its just the beginning. And meeting them brought back memories of school.

As I went through all this, I could not help but think about some of my friends who have opted to home school their kids. I am not an advocate for homeschooling and am against the idea. Of course, I respect the decision that my friends are making for it is for the best of their own kids. I had asked one friend and she said that it was more for character building and to minimise negative influences. I felt that my daughter's experiences being in school, making friends and going through graduation was building character. True, negative influences may come but that is something that our parenting would have to manage as the time comes. I just felt that it may not be the best for children to be deprived of such experiences. I had negative school experiences but some of the friends I made in school were also some of my best. I regretted the fact that I never graduated from Kindy... yes I was a kindergarten drop-out! But thats another story... I think the teachers of those days can be hauled off for child abuse easily!

Primary 1 Orientation

We went for Sarah's Primary 1 orientation and had not expected that she would be brought away for a readiness test. we arrived a little late and the children were all clustered into their classes and walking towards the classrooms by the time we arrived. My heart stopped when Sarah was led away and Tasnym wailed away as Sarah walked off without even looking back! Oh my, my baby has really grown up! I think dear hubby was feeling the same way as he went off to make sure that she was ok in the classroom though we were told not to go up ... yes first time P1 parents...

And she came back without a single worry talking away about how easy her test was and the only problem she had was with the Malay paper where the Malay teacher had to translate the instructions for her! So malu! All she could complain about was how bored she was in the room, well obviously she would not be having any problems settling in... and my worries about food would be laid to rest as parents are allowed to be with their kids at recess for the first 3 days... the only worry this mother has left is whether she will make friends and good friends too... Seems like I am crying over the loss of her friendship with her best friend, Sabrina while she seems completely ok abt it.... still too young I guess to know the meaning of friendship...

I was just so surprised that day when I met old friends from Primary School, Secondary school and even from work were sending their kids to Primary 1 at Sarah's school, almost a reunion of sorts... Some friendships losta nd some friendships found...

And it was money flying out that day what with paying for the uniforms, socks, shoes, books... thank God the fees is on $5.50 a month. It was really almost like an International school, Koreans, Chinese, Indians, Caucasians, Malays, Japanese.... and I got so excited learning about how the kids were going to learn languages through speech and drama, have computer classes etc... all in Primary1! Makes me kind of wish that I could repeat my Primary 1 all over again.

And now we have got to start convincing Tasnym all over again that she would be in a different school from Sarah next year...

Its going down down down

I have been making a real conscientious effort in watching my calorie intake and its really making a difference.... but I have to admit that any effort at weight loss is precisely that... an EFFORT! There is no miracle cure to losing weight... it takes discipline but there are somethings that you can do to make it easier and make it look like you are not making much of an effort...

One thing I definitely learn is NOT to starve yourself and NOT to skip meals... you wont gain anything from doing that apart from making yourself HUNGRY, tremendously so.... it also does not work to deprive yourself of certain kinds of food... like my cousin found out, it just made her angry and resentful of her hubby who was happily eating away...

You can eat what you want, the key is in moderation... and the way to get to that is to cut it back bit by bit... like I mentioned earlier, there is no miracle cure, if you want a fast way, go join that weight loss program... whats' the name? Biggest loser? And trust me they will work you off your butt... if you do have the time to lose weight gradually and want it to last cos you change the way you eat and know that you have no discipline? Go slow, its easier on your body and easier for you to follow through...

What are my tips?
1) Drink lots of water and green tea... wash away the toxins and jump start our metabolic rate
2) Lessen your portion bit by bit so your body gets used to eating less
3) Increase your activity level... I know some people hates exercise so do other stuff that dun feel like exercise but burns calories just the same such as walking round the mall for 1.5 hours, that will burn close to 200 calories and is the same to walking around the tracks... or you can wak faster than what you usually do, walk up the stairs, walk from one bus stop away but I think the walking around the mall is definitely the easiest for me!
4) Allow yourself that cake or favourite food.... just not everyday and lessen the portion as well...
5) Eat a fruit before your meal so you feel full and would eat less as well

As time goes by, you increase this bit by bit as well.... and soon you find yourself more active and fit... and naturally eating less as well... all leading to weight loss

Try it... might work for you to

Soyee!

It is so interesting to see how a baby develops language... one day they can say nothing, and then one syllable and overnight, that then becomes one word and one sentence...

One day they dunno the word and the next they do...

Just like Daniah...one day she says, more, more, the next she starts saying somemore and then completely stuns us one day when she said, I want some more.....how appropriate for this bottomless baby bird who would never fail to open her mouth wide and go "ah, ah, ah" upon seeing any food trays coming her way!

then out of the blue, she started saying Soyee to everything, whether it was her fault or not....So she would bump into something and then goes "Soyee! Soyee!"

She is also a terror in school, pushing kids out of the way in school... I wonder how that is gonna turn out? Push someone away and then say Soyee? Well she already know how to blame others... just ask her who has drawn on her hands etc.. even when caught red handed with a marker in her hand, she will point to her sisters and say "kakak"!

Hari Raya Blues

Don't you feel that this Raya feels different somehow? And it is not just me saying it ... the feel is just not there... on the first day, I said to my hubby that it appears as if we were the only ones out and dun seem to see any other Malays doing the same... not on the roads, not at the bus stops... some were saying that it is cos of the exams but dun tell me all the Malay families are having kids facing PSLE, or their O or A levels...

Even the taxi drivers are complaining that somehow they did not seem to have many Malay passengers this round... The recession hitting hard?

I dun seem to understand the recent spate of articles in the Malay papers recently criticising the way the Malays celebrate Aidilfitri... some I do agree... like the Malays who dun fast but go over the top when it comes to celebrating... or those who overspend and start overhauling their home each year till they go into debt... but is it so wrong the we visit our relatives and for them to visit us in turn? Isn't it berkat to have people coming over to our home and if we only should visit the elder and dun get visited in return... well I think it becomes very sad...so I only get visited when I grow old and not before?

And what's with the criticism of us wearing baju kurung only during Aidilfitri? Would they rather we dun wear it at all? Isn't it good that at least we do... to keep that culture alive....

Why must it always be a criticism about what the Malays do while the other cultures are praised and placed in high regard for what they practise? What about borrowing some or learning from what that is good and yet keeping our own culture alive minus the negatives? So, I am all for bringing up the spirit of Ramadan... but we do not need to denounce our spirit of visiting in Aidilfitri. There was an article highlighting how in some other cultures, families would invite others to their home for feasting during Ramadan cos this is a way of earning good deeds... but the question I have is do they invite those of the same status as them or do they invite the poor? Cos if they do the latter then good but if they do only the former, then what is so great about that? And we can also invite the poor to our home during Aidilfitri right?

Even the culture of asking forgiveness on the mornings of Aidilfitri is bashed... that is not on practised in Singapore but also Indonesia and Malaysia... that is our culture... what is so wrong with that? Isnt it a good thing as a practise? Of course, I agree that we should not just keep this practise to Aidilfitri to seek forgiveness and it should be a regular thing we do .... but to bash this just because the other cultures dun do it? That I dun get.... Diversity is not a crime...not that I know of anyway...

The things kids say!

Grandpa (Yayi): I want to be a hero, you think I can be a hero?
Sarah: You cannot become a hero, your stomach is too big!!

Tasnym to Daniah as they see the Superstar Virgo
Tasnym: Daniah, Sarah and I went on that ship. You never go because that time you were not born yet because mama and papa not yet get married!

Gosh the scandal! Mama and Papa not yet get married? With two kids already in tow?
: )

Anyway Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf zahir dan batin to all Muslims! And my diet went completely downhill with all the good food we feasted on these past 3 days....my weight has gone up up up!! stay down, stay down!

unfortunately this year, our ketupats did not turn out too well. Half unravelled in the water while the rest were to hard... all cos we put in too much rice... must remember to only put in 1/3 next time! All my backbreaking work to waste...

It was also a very tearjerking Hari Raya as we got the girls to also salaam and ask for forgiveness early that morning... Tasnym started crying even as she saw me cry while Sarah hid behind the sofa!

This year was also a different one for me... for the first time in my life, I did not go to JB on the first day of Hari Raya cos my granny had gone to KL instead. It feels so different and it felt like I did not have her, I actually teared as I spoke to her on the phone... how easily we take things we have for granted... And for the first time ever, I was actually told that I strongly resemble my late paternal grandfather, whom I have never met before as he passed away when my dad was only 3. Interesting huh? Out of all my cousins, I am the only one who has taken on the most Indian features especially with my nose... as my cousins say, the witches' nose!

Its going down!

And to my happy surprise... I now weigh 64.5... for the first time in I dunno how many years... my hubby is jealous though... mwa ha ha....

Well it seems like I am losing weight so much faster now as compared to the months when I was exercising... I have not been exercising much for the past 2 months as had been too busy and fasting... I don't think exercising was the wrong thing to do, it helped to increase the metabolic rate definitely... but in itself was not sufficient to cause a loss... I suspect that the months of exercising however, helped me to lose my weight now... I actually lost 3 kg in the fasting month alone when I actually took months to weigh 1 kg previously... definitely it is a combi of both diet and exercise that really aids weight loss....

This was such a huge difference from last year when I did not lose weight at all during the fasting month... the exercise regime I went thru this year I think set the stage for the weight loss once I started cutting down on the food intake... and cut I did... with half portions even at break fast and not taking too much junk food laden with calories....

The trick now is to ensure that it does not go back up after next week's feasting....

First time first try... part II

First time, first try.... and yes! Sarah is in the swimming class... learning how to tread water and jumping off platforms!! Tasnym? Well yes, she is still in the class... but no way would she jump off the platform or let go of her training board. She was screaming away in terror when the coach tried to take it away from her!!

And a first too for Sarah... she fasted the whole day for about 3 days, though most days has been half days.... fantastic for a first timer... she did all that while tasnym did her version of the fast, not eating but just drinking milk... enough to make her face rounder again!